Episode 45: Trauma Bonds, Stockholm Syndrome and How They Relate to Narcissistic Abuse

Trauma bonding, a term developed by Patrick Carnes, is the misuse of fear, excitement, sexual feelings, and sexual physiology to entangle another person.

Trauma bonds can prime a person to confuse intensity with sincerity. Bad times bond people as strongly as good times...perhaps even more so.

People that are in abusive relationships tend to hang in there until they can't hang in there anymore (or they are discarded)--and in part this is thought to be due to trauma bonds.

Stockholm syndrome is a psychological condition that causes hostages to develop sympathetic sentiments towards their captors, often sharing their opinions and acquiring romantic feelings for them as a survival strategy during captivity. These feelings, resulting from a bond formed between captor and captives during intimate time spent together, are generally considered irrational in light of the danger or risk endured by the victims. Generally speaking, Stockholm syndrome consists of "strong emotional ties that develop between two persons where one person intermittently harasses, beats, threatens, abuses, or intimidates the other."

Keep in mind that the only sincere apology is changed behavior--anything else is either them deluding themselves or manipulating you (or a combination of both).

From the full livestream October 19th 2016
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Do you have a narcissist, sociopath, or psychopath in your life, or think that you might? Are you in (or recently out of) of a relationship that you can only describe as crazy making, toxic, or like a lifetime TV movie? Then you are in the right place.

The live streams are a time where we "meet" every Wednesday at 8:30pm EST to ask questions, and give answers and support. I give my two cents, as do many of the other people in the chat. If you can't make it to the live stream, you can email me your question at: [email protected] I get a lot of questions, but I do my best to bring up and answer as many of them as I can each week. :)

To get support: www.ThriveAfterAbuse.com/forum

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Disclaimer: I am not a therapist, doctor, attorney, or expert in Narcissism...or anything at all really. If anything, I am a student of life, love, behavior and behavior change, and a woman who is dedicated to thriving.

Professionally, I worked as an advocate for victims of domestic violence at a domestic violence shelter, and currently I am a psychiatric nurse. Personally, I have been through two relationships with narcissists, and have been able to not only survive those, but have been able to move forward and thrive.

My goal with these videos is to share all of my lessons learned, as well as to start many important conversations about abuse, and recovery with the hopes that together we can provide the clarity, closure, and healing that we all deserve.

Remember: You are not crazy. You are not alone. And yes, you really can heal from this.