#181 | A Motherless Mother in Recovery Experiencing Birth As the Ultimate Surrender

Melissa Pennel was thirty-four years old when she was pregnant for the first time. She already had experienced significant life challenges: She had lost her own mother a few years earlier, plus she was seven years sober. Her pregnancy presented several health scares along the way, such as a two-vessel cord and a perceived hole in the baby's heart, eliciting words like possible "fetal demise" from her providers and the potentiality of "organs not developing normally". Her baby was also breech until 36 weeks, keeping Melissa questioning whether her own ego and attachment to a natural birth were the reasons for her challenges. She then went post-term, all the way to 42 weeks, despite pressure from her providers, and during a vaginal exam at her check-up, the amniotic sac "accidentally" ruptured. Due to her work in recovery and a strong muscle for accepting responsibility, she kept coming back to the feeling that she was somehow creating these situations herself - she called this "the choke-hold of control". Melissa caught herself forming negative beliefs like, "Everything's going wrong" and "Nothing is going to be easy." Once her OB broke her waters, she was advised to be induced, and an extremely long and difficult labor ensued.Traumatized by her first birth, Melissa both took greater responsibility and surrendered further in her second pregnancy, realizing that the only person who had to "have her back" was herself.  A year later, she birthed her second daughter on her terms and far more quickly and easily than she dreamed.Today Melissa views pregnancy as a powerful vessel for self-growth and transformation--a container she says which, "poured MiracleGro on all her issues," while learning the delicate balance of what she could and could not control.  Melissa is the author of the following books:https://linktr.ee/MelissaPennelQuestions You'll Wish You Asked: A Time Capsule Journal for Parents and Children Questions You'll Wish You Asked: A Time Capsule  Journal for Grandmothers and GrandchildrenThe Motherless New Mother's Pregnancy Journal**********This show is sponsored by:Silverette USA*DYPER*Beautiful Births and Beyond*Postpartum Soothe*Baby Notebook - Get the App Here*Use promo code DOWNTOBIRTHConnect with Cynthia and Trisha at:Instagram: @downtobirthshow on InstagramEmail: [email protected] with us on Patreon for our exclusive content.Email [email protected] @downtobirthshowCall us at 802-GET-DOWN Work with Cynthia: 203-952-7299 HypnoBirthingCT.com Work with Trisha: 734-649-6294 Please remember we don’t provide medical advice. Speak to your licensed medical provider for all your healthcare matters.

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Join Cynthia Overgard and Trisha Ludwig once per week for evidence-based straight talk on having a safe and informed birth, which starts with determining if you've hired the right provider. If we had to boil it down to a single premise, it's this: A healthy mom and baby isn't all that matters. We have more than 30 years' experience between us in midwifery, informed rights advocacy, publishing, childbirth education, postpartum support and breastfeeding, and we've personally served thousands of women and couples. Listen to the birth stories of our clients, listeners and celebrities, catch our expert-interviews, and submit your questions for our monthly Q&A episodes by calling us at 802-GET-DOWN. We're on Instagram at @downtobirthshow and also at Patreon.com/downtobirthshow, where we offer live ongoing events multiple times per month, so be sure to join our worldwide community. We are a Top .5% podcast globally with listeners in more than 80 countries every week. Become informed, empowered, and have a great time in the process. Join us and reach out any time - we love to hear from you. And as always, hear everyone, listen to yourself.