322. HEAD NOISE: Am I Being Too Needy, A Tricky Friendship, and Fixing a Mismatched Sex Life

It's Headnoise my beans and that means it’s time for me to answer your questions. Here’s what I’m tackling this week. AND if you want me to answer your question just email me at [email protected]    I’ve had the same partner for a few years and we’re two women in our 20s. We’ve had a few bumps in the road as most relationships do, and without sounding like a douche a fair few have them have been her doing/from her. She has pushed me away quite a few times and treated our relationship poorly in the beginning. We’ve been in a more stable and healthy relationship in the last 9  months. I still think we can get better from both sides, and listening to your podcast has made me want to share your advice with her. She doesn’t like self-help or advice books and things. How can I get her more invested without pushing her boundaries. Am I being needy and are my expectations unfair? My best mate of many years has a complicated life and mental health struggles. She has serious enmeshment with everyone she meets. Her self-image is the most important quality to her. She’s struggled with her body image issues and projected that onto her friends. She’s very rarely single for longer that 2 weeks. She’s in therapy but mostly focuses on her sexual and romantic relationships. She’s quite selfish. I’m struggling with resentment given how long we have been friends and how badly her behaviour affects me and others. Sex in my long term relationship is fizzling. I’m worried about getting the ick too after a few therapy sessions where the counsellor called out red flags in my partners behaviour. My partner really is quite sexually physical and I’m just not interested in his lacklustre foreplay and just want him to hurry up so I can go to sleep. I know this question is asked a lot but what can I do? I love my partner and don’t want this to be the end. LINKS Listen to 'Where Should We Begin' with Esther Perel https://www.estherperel.com/podcast . Join the DYFM Facebook Group https://bit.ly/dyfm-group . Follow @dyfmpodcast on IG  Follow @alexispredez on IG   Follow @listnrentertainment on IG  CREDITS Host: Alexis Fernandez       Executive Producer & Editor:  Elise CooperDigital Producer:  Zoe Panaretos DYFM Social Producer: Shania MaguaManaging Producer: Sam Cavanagh  Find more great podcasts like this at www.listnr.com  See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

Om Podcasten

Mindset hacks for a badass life, hosted by cognitive neuroscientist Alexis Fernandez. On Mondays we dive into episodes with a combo of neuroscience and pop pscyhology: your pep talk and mindset hacks are all here. I deep dive into everything from habit formation and how to live a carefree life, to friendships and heartbreak. And on Thursdays we've got Head Noise - where I answer your questions! Email [email protected] to submit your questions.