Dadvengers #29 - Abdul Bangura
Dadvengers Podcast Episode 29 - Abdul Bangura. ***Trigger Warning*** – This episode contains topics that may be triggering for some listeners. Namely birth trauma, grief, and custody battles. This week’s guest has built two successful businesses in his lifetime, is a proud single dad, and is here to share his parenting experience with us! Abdul always wanted to be a dad when the time was right. But when it happened at 29 he wasn’t ready. But with support from his dad, he stepped up and was a part of the pregnancy. This is only the beginning of his story, Abdul went through and incredible introduction to fatherhood which saw his life changed by the covid pandemic. He also had to fight a custody battle to be guardian for his own daughter and on top of that he also lost his business and sunk into deep depression – before deciding to get help and turning things around. Abdul's story is so inspirational. He's living proof that asking for help with mental health is a good thing and we are so glad Abdul shared his story with us. Time Codes 2:13 – “My dad is one of 17…!” - Abdul grew up in a big blended family that made him want to be a dad one day. 6:39 – “I wasn’t ready… I was pi**ed.” – Abdul’s reaction to finding out he was going to be a dad. 12:15 – “My dad told me ‘what makes you think you can leave your child’… he was right”. – The conversation with Abdul’s father that made him realise he had to step up. 18:19 – “It went from ‘it might be a chest infection’ to ‘she needs an emergency caesarian’.” – His daughter’s mum was the first pregnant woman in the UK to be diagnosed with Covid-19. 21:44 – “I wasn’t allowed in because of corona”. – Abdul’s daughter was born five weeks early. 23:47 – “I was a zombie”– Abdul on grieving for his daughter’s mother and being a new dad. 26:56 – “Social services said ‘we can’t let the child go home with you' We took it to court”. – Abdul fight for custody of his own daughter. 37:45 – “A mum wouldn’t have gone through that”. – The unfairness of the family court system for dads. 41:21 – “I felt like I could do more for her welfare – so I did”. – What pushed Abdul onto fight for custody of his daughter. 44:51 – “I was in the deepest state of depression… and I have a screaming baby” – Abdul was adjusting to single parenting while battling his mental health. 48:37 – “If you don’t go out and provide your child won’t eat, that was my lightbulb moment”. – Abdul had a new business idea to provide for his child. 56:00 – “Put your pride to the side and talk to someone”. – Abdul sought help for his mental health.