140 | Reclamation - Jennifer Walton
“It’s not the baby. It’s you.” These are the words that Jennifer Walton would hear from her medical provider as he determined with a quick cervical check that she would need to deliver her baby via surgical birth. He later told her that she would never be able to deliver vaginally because a baby couldn’t fit through her pelvis. Jennifer didn’t want a c-section and made that clear to her provider. But the cascade of interventions and the lack of informed consent would send them into a spiral that left little room to catch up mentally to what was about to happen to Jennifer physically. There had been no complications or concerns, but a lull in labor would drastically alter Jennifer and her husband, Sean’s plans. Their first baby would be born healthy, but the trauma of the surgical birth would linger into their postpartum world. Postpartum anxiety marked Jennifer’s experience. She struggled with intrusive thoughts and bonding with baby Sabella. Jennifer took critical steps by connecting with valuable community resources and people to guide her to a healthy space. Today, she can speak from a healed mind and spirit from her trauma as time has passed. The Waltons welcomed their second pregnancy while caring for a young toddler. Jennifer determined that this birth would be different. The first pregnancy had been easy, and they had the rug pulled from under them in the twilight hours of labor. Jennifer had changed; she had been fire tested and felt prepared to put in the work to change the narrative that the doctor had created about her body. The weight of his words pressed into her psyche. She knew that she wanted a VBAC and stacked the deck to support her goal. Jennifer selected a new OB/GYN; she was a Black woman and made her feel supported and heard. Her friend introduced her to the term doula, and where she could find one. She connected with her perinatal support doula, Jessica Roach, at Restoring Our Own Through Transformation (ROOTT). ROOTT is a collective of concerned Black families, community members, advocates & interdisciplinary professionals dedicated to decreasing Black maternal & infant mortality in Ohio. The heart of their work is the commitment and rigorous training of their perinatal support doulas. Jessica educated her about her rights as a patient, guided her family through a healthy pregnancy, and helped strengthen their resolve for Jennifer to deliver their baby vaginally. She would still experience some pushback as her provider became more cautious and decided she wanted Jennifer to labor at the hospital for close monitoring. Jennifer asked her ROOTT doula to attend her next prenatal appointment to provide advocacy for her birth plan. Jessica’s expertise and skill assuaged the provider’s concerns, and she was able to create a team that supported her dream and could build a bridge between the two birth workers. The fear of a uterine rupture would still linger in her mind, but with the support of her birth team, she moved forward with planning her VBAC. While laboring at home, Jennifer recalled Jessica’s words, “Stop fighting your body and let this thing happen.” She did stop fighting her body. She let go of the defeating messages from her first pregnancy, surrendered to the process, and found her voice and strength. She gave birth to another healthy and strong daughter, accomplishing her VBAC.